Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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