Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Randomize
