Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
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