Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(304): View more from West Virginia

remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?

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(816): View more from Missouri

I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now

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(917): View more from New York City

Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.

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(607): View more from New York

To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.

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(678): View more from Georgia

I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.

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(914): View more from New York

I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken

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(630): View more from Illinois

Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?

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(919): View more from North Carolina

U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.

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