There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
we're so committed to being not committed
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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