He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
