It's Friday. Sex?
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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