My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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