theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
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