we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
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