i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Randomize