so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Randomize
