I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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