God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
