chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Randomize