Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I'm sorry my penis didn't work
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
