my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Randomize
