This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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