"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I forget how to act sober
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