I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
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