Rock
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Fuck
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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