...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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