so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
Randomize
