Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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