the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Randomize
