She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
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WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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