if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
