I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
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