just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Randomize