It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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