how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Randomize