tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
you traded sex for a burrito?
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
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