What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
