Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
this beer tastes like vomit already
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Randomize
