their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Randomize
