I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
