last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
this is an emotional support booty call
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Randomize
