This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
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