More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
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