i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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