my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize