So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Randomize
