I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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