Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
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