In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
When are your genitals available?
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Randomize
