My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
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