If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
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