i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.