But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Randomize
