this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
