I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize